Saying Sorry - Why Over Apologizing is bad for your Self-Confidence
/One word that you can stop saying today is, Sorry. Lately I have been practicing removing the word sorry from my vocabulary.
I used to say it all the time, at least 100 times a day. I would say it for no reason and in every situation. I would say it while at the store, walking around. I would say it for just existing. And I started noticing that it was a word that not everyone used. Why is that?
Well I began to see that the word is not necessary in every situation and when I dug deeper I realized that it was actually a subtle way I was minimizing myself. It was me saying "I'm not worthy of being here" and/or "I am not good enough."
And when I became aware of it and how much I say it, it was astounding. I began to see patterns of how people treated me and reacted to me in any given situation as a result. I was had the lower hand because I was always apologizing for nothing, just for being.
Before anything I started practicing ways of not doing it anymore because once you have done something for so long it becomes a hard habit to break. I did things like, if I missed someone call because I was doing something I would no longer respond with, "I’m sorry I was on the other line.” with “I was on the other line.” I removed the word sorry from my vocabulary and started using “I apologize” instead whenever necessary. But be weary of replacing it and then becoming the ultimate “apologizer.” Use it sparingly only when you know there is something specific you need to apologize for and you will see the empowerment you will begin to bring back into your life.
I dove deep to find out why I may be doing this to begin with and I found that I had some self esteem issues that I had to work through and this practice definitely helped me see things differently.
Eventually I got better at not using the word all together and it started feeling really good. I didn't feel lower that anyone else anymore. And I started to feel more confident.
Its interesting though because when I stopped being aware of it I began saying it again and realized that it was an automatic impulse for me. I then put all these tips back into practice. This showed me that I still had more work to do in this practice in building my self esteem.
If you find yourself saying "sorry" a lot, start practicing not saying it and take a pulse on how you start feeling.
You are just as qualified to be here as anyone else is and you are just as important as anyone else is so stop apologizing for it.